Morning Chaos Lover T-Shirts

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

Face painting.

Multi-tasking.

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

"I don't care how good he is. Ain't nobody can get a short on Jeffrey."

'I'm just exercising my first amendment rights.'

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Tired Barbie

'How many blummin' shades of black ARE there?'

'Food fight!'

The Difficulties of Transporting Boats

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

Unsafe Drain Covers!

Lab studies suggest that a human growth pill is just around the corner.

'And this is what Larry calls his 'man cave'.'

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

This must be the address where Joe and Maureen are throwing the dinner party!

"The lunch, grab the lunch!"

Wind shear - 81 st and Lex

Fetching some bread

Although in hindsight, maybe she said feed the cat and water the plants.

At the McWit Eye Labs are two doors, 'Control Group' and 'Out of Control Group.'

A mad scientist.

Irritable gentleman disturbed by a bluebottle

"The Hamptons were nice but it feels good to be back in the city."

"It was a mistake to let the children chose their own instruments for the new music class...I have eleven cymbals, and Billy Fitzgerald chose the bagpipes!"

"Attention, everyone! Here comes Poppa, and we're going to drive dull care away! It's quips and cranks and wanton wiles, nods and becks and wreathed smiles."

Ernest Hemingway: Write drunk, edit drunk.

'Now do you believe me about every other driver on the road.'

Horse accidents