Moo-aficionado Pillows

Oh you baad bad girl!

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"This could be the marriage all our other marriages were for!"

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

"Then leave the horses head in the Futon." Middle-class mafia

Cats

"If he has more than 20 followers on Twitter we call him a 'celebrity'."

"According to national law you're innocent but national law counts less than. . ."

Emmanuel Macron and Angela Merkel.

Free love

'Last warning, Girard! Get rid of that mask!'

'Lewis and Cabrini.'

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

Br... No Exit

Maastricht - "Looks like a storm coming."

'I think the phrase 'jump the shark' has jumped the shark.'

"He's joined a whatsapp group for fans of Matt Hancock's Whatsapp messages."

"The madness started with the cow and spread to the others."

Oops! Basketball Game Interrupted

"Holding an open contest on social media and announcing the winner may not be the most secure way to pick a password."

"I'm getting HIM a mug that says: I woke up like this!"

Driver sees man in front of church with sign: 'Fell Asleep and Wet the Pew': 'Huh - a church that's into public shaming.'

"I only hope we're distrusted in a specific and limited way."

"Who's up for some commercially successful music?"

David Cameron's Diplomatic Marathon

"It's not you—it's natural selection."

Senor Bean or Mr. Zapatero, I presume?

"Regarding Brexit and the border with Northern Ireland, we will build a wall..."

"I learned my social skills on social media. . . what's it to you anyway you stupid cow?!"