Monument Maestro Gifts

'Well it's o.k. but you should see his Taj Mahal.'

'Ms Simpson, I believe I've finally done it. I've written the Great American Memo.'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

A woman playing a keyboard

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

"I understand the Everest climb used to be quite a chore."

'A few messages came in during your lunch break.'

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

Computer Music

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

Musician Sneezing Musical Notes

'It's another office memo from that Mr. Tolstoy.'

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

The TROU of the Baroque

Conducting Handel's Fireworks Music with a Sparkler

"Richard P. Ruggles—a man and his mantelpiece."

'Oh, hi Tom... I'm just putting some personal touch to my office.'

Yodelling School: Your calls may be recorded for training purposes.

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

"We may have the same ringtone, Kenneth, but they're in totally different keys."

Post-modern Café

A Blanksy

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

The Top and The Tippy-top (mountain climbing)

'Nothing to do? Why don't you read the refrigerator.'

"Bob’s just finishing the last chapter of his unauthorized autobiography."

'How are the memoirs coming along?'

Hairdressing for Bald People

'Ok, ok. We'll run through it one more time. The rabbit pops up, goes round the tree ..'

'Hey, Mister! Stop bawling at me!'

Off Road Wellies

Sculpt-by-numbers kit.

Giuseppe Verdi

Blowing your nose musically.