Monster Humor Fan Gifts

"The terms of your policy excludes stakes, sunlight, garlic and cruxifixes."

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

'... And this is my cellar.'

Godzillla eating people using telephone poles as chopsticks.

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

The creature from the trailer by the dried-up lagoon.

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

No, this is the red lagoon, the black one is down the road a bit.

"Cthulhus, sir. Thousands of 'em."

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

King Kongs first christmas

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

Official Fight Cards

'Hello there, how y'doin'?'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

King Kong Takes a Personal Day

Zombie pet tricks.

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

The missiles had failed...so it was down to Frank...and plan B.

"Gee, I'm awfully sorry!"

"There goes our early night."

'Kong, loved your resume but I have to ask for a drug test.'

Vampire collects bottles of blood from his doorstep.

Halloween Selfie

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'