Mom With A Twist Gifts

'Just doing the school run.'

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

"Boy, do we hate to see this... I'm afraid your child's entire body is an 'innie'."

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

"Where can I find the lefts?"

Quartet of chefs.

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

Businessman with briefcase pushes stroller with baby and its briefcase.

Cook in the cookery section.

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

'You were right, you are in the placebo group.'

I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

'Genius! Art class and snack time!'

Martians looking at Earth - 'One day son, all this will be yours.'

'Mom's doctor recommended she take up knitting as a way to relax.'

"No dessert until you eat all your candy."

'Next time your kid has a party, blow up the balloons with an airpump!'

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

'Have you got any good 'whodunnits'...?'

"Have you ever heard about deferred prosecution agreements, Mommie?"

'Before you return Principal Harris's phone call, I would like to remind you that having a 'living' dependant is an excellent tax deduction.'

'It's her signature dish.'

"Occasionally he lobs a brick at the cat."

'Home-made pie will be quick, I only live 10 minutes from here.'

Kate's Evil Plan: 'Danae...I got a letter from your teacher today...she say's you've been very well-behaved lately...and is worried about what you're really up to.'

"The first thing about living alone again is not to overdo the chintz."

'It's stew with a difference tonight - I've fried it.'

"How about supper in the tub tonight, Hon?"

Meals on Heels.

Mobile Phone Mobile.

"I often think of the 'Hereafter'. When I'm shopping I'm always asking myself 'What am I here after?'"

Maze Leading to a Cheese Shop