Modern Work Culture Enthusiast Gifts

"It's Labor Day...and you want to work instead of a day off? What's up with that?"

"Staff support"

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

'Say, our stress control seminar worked! Our sales are way down...but so what if they are.'

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

The new diet not working out too good, huh, Frank?

Free Range Employees.

Mr Yomp quickly got the hang of his new laptop.

"You've all been working very hard lately, and you deserve some time off. I'm giving you all a two-day membership to time-off.com."

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

-Great little number cruncher! -But lousy table manners.

"While you were out, Mr. Sundberg, the little hand went from the one to the three."

He's our ideas man. I can never tell if he's working or not.

"Hi Sean, welcome to my open space. Take a stand and let's talk."

"I'm a firm believer in distributed leadership. That means that I make all the decisions then you type them up and distribute them to the staff."

Well, we've generated enough hot air...it must be time to cram it in a trial balloon and float it.

"To be honest the culture sucks, but the pay is amazing."

"I decided to treat my employees like friends...now I hate all of them!"

Group of people.

"Can't complain- it's against company policy."

"It's his dream job ... "

Time Clock.

'In keeping with the company's policy on after-hours availability, he'll be buried with his phone.'

Your talk of promptness seems to have worked - everybody was out of here by one minute after five.

"We're going to try something new next Monday. It's called 'Bring Your Brain to Work Day.'"

Don't worry. It's just something I like to call the 'Chain of Command...

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?

"Don't be shy. We're real casual around here."

"You're one of the short termed employed. You're out of here tomorrow."

"Building a ninja-attracting business culture is easy. Keeping them focused on equity-based financial analysis? Not so easy."

"I have called this meeting to order... so where’s that lunch menu?"