Modern Socializer Gifts

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

Quiz Night...

'Looks like everyone has FINALLY gone home.'

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

"Would you like to be notified by text when I'm bored and want to go home?"

"I finally lost a few ounces with my activity tracker. I took it off."

Beer Garden Kit

The Devil's advocaat.

Getting old...

"You ruin every virtual party we go to!"

'She's spring cleaning and you?'

"Oh, no thank you. I’m rumaki-free."

Will Make You Sick So You Can Go Home.

"I'm Generation Z. Nice to meet you."

'Well at least we know there's no chance of either of us being over the drink-drive limit!'

'I wish my wife would stop playing mind games with me. I'm tired of losing.'

"Every bar has its obnoxious drunk."

It's called 'Pretentious.' It tastes like crap, but it's $100 per bottle!

Cliques Amongst Mathematicians.

"I moved here just six months ago and already I'm part of the local color."

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

"David! It's only trendy to drink beer straight from the bottle!"

'They all work from home now, but still get together for carpool reunions.'

"I've learned not to listen to critics who are right about me."

Running on Empty

"Can you turn your video on, Ralph?"

'Mrs Gridlington doesn't like being referred to as 'duck' or 'dearie'...so I just call her 'the old trout'!'

"The other thing I love about drinking is that you can't do it online."

Military Hospital.

Designated Drivers Area

'I'm going to have a few drinks with the guys...don't wait up for me.'