Modern Sleeper Pillows

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Bed Seasons

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

Interpretive napping

Shhh – I'm taking a virtual nap.

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

Programmer Dreams

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

Sleeping masks

For goodness sake, can't you see I'm on a night shift!

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

Yes, well, when you're grown up and king, your castle can have an indoor heated moat.

'Post-Hibernation Blues'

"Tonight the covers stay on my side."

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

Sleepless Night with a Mosquito

The Home Birth of Venus

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

'Why have you put that pen and notebook there?'

"For a great day's sleep you can't beat out new line of memory foam coffins."

'You're snoring in cadence.'

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

'He gets his best ideas that way.'

"No more getting up and having to go to the kitchen for a midnight snack."

Cat Dreams

Sleep-Eez Bedding

"This next one's for anyone out there who might still be awake."

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."