Fashionable Sleeper Pillows

Do you have them with button down collars? They're for a working breakfast.

Dog Park / Cat Park

Bed Seasons

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

Interpretive napping

Shhh – I'm taking a virtual nap.

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

'Oh, you nasty sluggard!'

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The Off-Season

For goodness sake, can't you see I'm on a night shift!

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

"What do you have that's bigger than 'king'?"

Sleeping masks

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

I guess I just assumed we'd skip Take your child to work day this year. Chips.

"Tonight the covers stay on my side."

Sleepless Night with a Mosquito

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

The Home Birth of Venus

'Why have you put that pen and notebook there?'

"For a great day's sleep you can't beat out new line of memory foam coffins."

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

"No more getting up and having to go to the kitchen for a midnight snack."

'He gets his best ideas that way.'

Cat Dreams

Sleep-Eez Bedding

'I can't sleep a wink - it feels like someone's got their life savings under here.'

Hang the PJ's

The Princess and the Pea

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."