Modern Shopper Ponderer Gifts

Apple Ready Meals.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Now that was post-modern sex."

Truth

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

"So this is fun---the artist is actually with us tonight."

"Hang on - I've got an app for this. . ."

Bowther, Wilkin, Lynch & Fisk

'You know you're 40 when...'(women)

Vendo Tree.

'The way I got it doped out, post-modern man is all context and fragment.'

"What is it going to be, a breakfast or shampoo?"

'Mail order? You said all the toys were hand-made!'

'I may not know much about art but I know what I like to slag off.'

'I remember my pin but I've forgotten my signature!'

Feed & Grain. Credit Cards and E-Payments Only. Being a cash cow is tougher than it used to be.

"This is an expensive habit - I keep stubbing out my e-cigarettes."

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

'They're our neighbours. We invited them on the off chance they may turn out to be post-modern.'

"Remember when we used to flock together, instead of just tweeting all day on line?"

If a cell phone vibrates in the woods, does anyone give a damn?

Officer Worker Evolution

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"I wouldn't know if it was just picked. We farm out the actual farming"

Shopper reading Shopenhauer in bookshop

Although skeptical at first, Emma was beginning to see the benefits of bluetooth beacons in her shopping experience.

Santa Amazon and the Christmas slaves were diligent again.

Toothpaste mental shutdown.

"What are your policies regarding the collection and use of children's data?"

'A frog prince?... Not that old line again!'

"Tell me again about how I can shop online and have gifts delivered without leaving my office."

"This still life is an example of the use of irony in postmodern art."

"We've already done this room. I remember that fire extinguisher."