Modern Romance Ponderer Gifts

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

'A frog prince?... Not that old line again!'

"Why don't you ever put your hand on my knee?"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

"Now that was post-modern sex."

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

Truth

The sad case of the blind-men and the elephant.

'As is the fashion these days, it's about nothing.'

"Have you seen my wife?"

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

'I love your poetry, m'dear - it's very Ezra Poundish.'

"Oh Adam. This is the second...sorry, I mean third happiest day of my life."

"We're taking separate vacations this year."

Meaningful...Meaningless relationships.

"If you were the only man in the world, and I were the only woman. . . would we still have to diet?"

He's very disciplined about his writing, three hours staring at a blank screen every morning and five in the afternoon.

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

"I'm giving love one more try."

Bowther, Wilkin, Lynch & Fisk

"Well, we can eat out, order in, or just sit here and let our bodies slowly gnaw away at our muscle tissue."

"I'm afraid you will have to sign a non-disclosure agreement."

The Good Samaritan.