Modern Life Commentators Pillows

Help. Forgot All My Account Passwords.

Blues for now.

'I told you never to call me at work!'

The cost of bringing up children soars to more than £140,000.

Evolution Homo Sapiens museum intelligence.

Modern Attention Spans

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"We think it has something to do with your genome."

Peter

"It keeps it out of sight when we're not watching it."

"You are still here."

"Excuse me, Doc, my attention wandered. What type of deficit disorder did you say I had?"

"It's a mixed-use facility: retail space, low-rent housing, luxury apartments, and an area set aside for making steel."

Daily Routine

Early Man Late Man

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Snowman Driver

Goodnight Social Media.

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"They put nipples on the mannequins so you'll look at the stupid sweaters. Duh!"

"Is there someone have called Frobisher?"

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

"No way! You're a telemarketer?! This is so great – hold on, I want to get comfortable ... how did you get my number?"

"The doctor wants you to point to where it hurts."

"I've got something in what used to be a decrepit, run-down, unfashionable area."

Our Troubled Chowders

"I don't care if it does have wifi. . . it's a vegetable peeler!"

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

'I was texting when my pop spilled on my laptop, which made me drop my iPod. So you see, officer, it wasn't my fault. Blame technology.'