Modern Gifter Pillows

'Since we're already here, why don't we save a lot of time, and just buy some gift cards...'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

celebrating a birth.

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

'If you really loved me you would have bought me flowers.'

'Yeah, yeah, very cute... she couldn't have just sent me an e-card?'

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Love.

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

Birthday Racing Car

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

Valentines Balloons

'And that,and that,and that...'

"A cactus! Darling, you're such a romantic..."

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

'Aha! You can tell Dottie and the kids I didn't forget their presents!'

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

How the gift registry should really work

'Don't worry -- I used a bond issue.'

'A globe warming party?...Guys, you shouldn't have!'

A feminist Christmas.

'I know you've worked hard on it, dear, but maybe we should get the Rabbi a . . . uh. . . 'back up' birthday present too?'

Santa's Out Tray.

Bagel problems.

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

'You've agreed to work Sundays, haven't you!'

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to the less fortunate...

'The farmer's kids asked me to wake them early tomorrow: It's Christmas day!'

"The Valentine's Day gift that has it all - a card made from edible flowers dipped in chocolate!"

"Mom...There's nothing to do..."