Modern Family Dynamic Explorer T-Shirts

"I can't remember what I did with all the data on your computer. A substantial raise in my allowance would jar my memory."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Ahhh...'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

'I demand a DNA test.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Papa Bear was too much, Mama Bear wasn't enough, and I always had to be just right."

"Having nannies really changes you."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

He wanted a different one.

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"Ours will be the first mixed marriage in my family. Dog people NEVER marry cat people."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"If you really loved me you wouldn't have called me Euthanasia!"

"But I brought you here so I wouldn't have to play with you."

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

"She may be awhile. Her mother's helping her park."

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

"If you see this as motherly advice, we have a whole new subject to explore."

"I like to think that each generation will need a little less therapy than the generation before."

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

'Hi, honey?we're home!'

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

"Ask Mom for Sweet Chunk Cookies. If she says no, ask Grandma."