Modern Beauty Seekers Gifts

Forever 31: Hair Implants & Egg Freezing

Tunnel of TV

"Botox."

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

She. 'Isn't it a pretty view?' Susceptible Youth. 'Awfully pretty, by Jove!'

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

Analysis of Beauty - Plate I.

'The old one fell apart.'

"You've taken those hideous curlers out, had a scrub up, shaved your legs. Looks like it's your lucky night babe."

The Ugly Plant

'Mirror mirror on the wall who's the fairest one of all considering her age?'

'Sure, I can make you look like Venus de Milo, but it will take two amputations!'

Yes, well, when you're grown up and king, your castle can have an indoor heated moat.

Landscape artist

Where Mom used to take you.

"Ready now, Miss Henderson."

"I'll bet you'd like me if I had curly hair."

'It's so ironic: I finally win a prize at a raffle and it has to be a free pedicure!'

"I told you she'd had some work done."

Primavera (Spring)

Cosmetic surgeon tells Ugly Duckling: 'Of course, there's a POSSIBILITY that you are a swan, but do you want to take that risk?'

"I'm old. What's good for that?"

The power of positive affirmations

"Sorry mate - I can't come to the pub after the match because I've got to embarrass myself filming an advert for moisturiser."

"It says here that they have chopped down all the palm trees and blow up the rocks to make the place look more natural..."

"Supersize me."

'Morag darlin', they've made you look like a hundred dollars!'

'Perfect.'

Flo didn't know what was odder: the beauty tip that hemorrhoid cream reduces bags under the eyes or that she actually tried this beauty tip.

'Plastic Surgery, come as you are and leave as you wish'

Fish Pedicure

Beauty Salon - "I'm just sorry we couldn't do more for you."

Caribou With Big Plans.

"I get my looks from my father...he's a plastic surgeon."