Innovative Beauty Seeker Gifts

Flo didn't know what was odder: the beauty tip that hemorrhoid cream reduces bags under the eyes or that she actually tried this beauty tip.

Bad hair day!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Pampered and poodled.

Dating is so expensive...

What price beauty?

"I don't like your application."

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

New Twenty Blades

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"Botox."

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

Mirror mirror...

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

"I look kind of nice today. . . How long have I been this ugly?"

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

She. 'Isn't it a pretty view?' Susceptible Youth. 'Awfully pretty, by Jove!'

'Botox...'

"More concealer?"

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

Complete Makeover

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

A cow with a Brazilian.

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.