Modern Art Marveler T-Shirts

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

Swiss army knife

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

"I'm looking for something really dull and repetitive."

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Juggler and Illusionist

"It's wonderful, darling. It really says Manhattan."

"Mother! How? Wait — where’s Dad?!"

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

"I don't want to take this meeting off track, but... isn't Stonehenge amazing? Seriously, who did that?"

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

The Department of Emerging Technologies.

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

"His name is Jonah. Are you sure you haven't seen him?"

A weather vane on top of an artist's studio points in directions that include: "pop", "abstract", "figurative" and "post-painterly".

Just what is it that amoebas really want.

'I've spent a fortune wining and dining you today Julie and now you tell me you love Picasso!'

The Quantum Mechanic...

"Is it just me, or is it humid up here?"

A bird pulls the thread from a magic carpet.

'It's an honest piece.'

Walking on Water

"They ruin the landscape!"

'Note his bold brush strokes, Fred...'

'Excuse me, where's the nanotechnology department?' - 'You just trod on it.'

"And do you also promise to be LinkedIn for life, facebook friends forever and to stay off Tinder till you're burnt to a cinder?"

"Honey, could you grab the Bible? I need to double-check something."

Schrödinger's cat.

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

A microbe using his macroscope to search for intelligent forms of life.

'Moses, I'm going to have to fine you for failing to get an Environmental Impact Statement before parting the Red Sea.'

"Rabbit's on maternity leave. I'm the understudy. And take it easy on the ears."

'Who the heck has parted the Red Sea?!'

"Nice moat."