Modern Amenities Advocate T-Shirts

'You might be right, Sir. You may be right!...'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"Now you can send it."

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

'It's great to get back to the simple life'

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

Pop Top Ice FIshing

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

Hands-free laptop.

Santa Elevator

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

A family gets ready for their microwave meal on the patio.

"They need to come up with an app that will locate your glasses."

A mom watches as her children get into a large SUV using a staircase.

"This is the main house, plus there's a cottage on the property where your Lyft driver would live."

"I remodelled, but I left it so that when danger threatens I can still take refuge in the redoubt."

"Gracie, people don't understand how hard things used to be. Sure, we can be green and throw out the washing machines...but then we'd have to load up the dirty clothes, drive the car to the river, and wash everything with rocks!"

Exec Has His Whole Life At His Desk

"The rules don't say anything about Airbnb-ing your property to help pay off the mortgage."

'Everyone's depressed after income tax week, Cathy.'

"Why did we buy such huge furniture?"

"We are not buying a refrigerator with a learning curve."

'Please tell me there's more to this than this.'

"I usually wake up screaming at six-thirty, and I'm in my office by nine."