Mocktail Mixologist Gifts

Don't you think you've had too many drinks?

"So how did 'DRY JANUARY' go?"

James Bond in a Snow Globe

Yoga for Alcoholics

'Steak Ted?'

'OK, everybody...'Louie, Louie' from the top!'

Join me in a Martini?

We'll have Manhattans...

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

Shaken not stirred

"Shake! Good Dog."

A shop selling "Ice-cold Vodka" in 31 flavors.

A cat pours himself a gin and tonic.

Margarita

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

Espresso Martini Peacock

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

Baloneystini

You're the olive in my martini

The Martini is invented.

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

'..and if you must yawn tonight keep your mouth shut.'

'Fill her up. No ice - it takes up valuable space!'

"Hey! Hey! I could gopher another lemon drop over here, please and thank you."

"I'm trying to write a drinking song, but I can't get past the first couple of bars."

"I gotta cut you off, Pierre. That's your tenth 'pretend Manhattan' since you got here."

"Detox is two doors back, bro' - this is retox!"

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'

Rabbit Punch

'The first cocktail.'