Mocha Enthusiast T-Shirts

Remember how I came in on December 31st and ordered a lardo-size fudgsicle sugarbomb mocha with butter sprinkles? Well, give me another one of those. Since it's something I originally had last year, it'll be like I had this one last year too. So it won't violate my New Year's resolution. The ancient art of Time-Shift-Fu. I'm a tenth level grand master. I studied under Moe Yin, the master who created "it's not really 'cheating' if it's with an ex."

I've never been in here before. What's your best drink? That'd be the Gambler's Mocha. Sounds interesting. What's in it? Oh … a little of this, a little of that. For all you know, it's a smooth blend of hand-mixed Amedei Porcelana dark chocolate from Tuscany ... and Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee beans, hand-picked by sherpas 5,000 feet above sea level precisely at sunset ... topped with a light whip of frozen Arctic sea foam, and black diamond cream from Dubai ... for all you know ... Or it coul

I've been told I can order a small mocha. Told? Because of my heart rate and activity level over the past seven days, I've been allotted a daily limit of 1,426 calories. I'm told that's just enough to include one small mocha. Hold on … there's vibrating ... Hold on ... hold on ... buffering ... Bing! Fitness overlords says I'm one calorie away from a medium mocha. It says yelling burns one calorie. I've got to get that app.

"Spare change please mister, for a Mocha Frappuccino with cinnamon sprinkles?"

Sermon on the Grounds...

Sermon on the Grounds...

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Occu-Pie Mars

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

"Black or white, Vicar?"

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Tea of Love

You're the botanicals in my gin

The Alpha Seltzer

Office Supplies/Coffee Supplies.

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Time for tea and friendship.

"On New Year's Eve, Clement and I stayed up all night drinking. Tea, of course."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

Countervailing Clichés.