Mobility Magician T-Shirts

"Hey look, pretty soon Uber is going to have flying cab service,"

'How fast can you hype?'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

Domestic Goddess.

Team Leader

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

'I think I'm decisive. Can I get back to you on that?'

'In keeping with the team approach, we've traded you for two middle managers to be named later.'

'I love it when you cook - it lets me practice faking it.'

Graduation day at Telekinesis School.

"This one comes with a special undo function for erasing any stupid thing you've done or said in your entire life. It doesn't really work, of course, but it's SUPER fun to play with!"

'Remember,Riley-as soon as you clear your desk you may leave early.'

'After you with the camouflage.'

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

"Things are getting desperate...we have to do something!"

Free and Open Source Software.

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

'Howard's short stay in the hospital was good for both of us. He finally appreciates my cooking.'

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

'You'll find loaves in the pantry and fishes in the freezer.'

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

"And there it is... Coronation chicken"

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that.'

"We're looking for fresh, exciting, independent voices which are very similar to those of our existing bestsellers."

"I gave your ‘compliments to the chef,’ and he’d like you to elaborate."

'I'm short of ingredients. What's a good substitute for filet mignon?'

Mobility scooter driver has stickers for all pedestrians he's knocked over.

"Don't even think about it."

'Hold' (an interpretative dance)

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.