Mobile Technology Expert Gifts

Jim Balsillie orders dessert...

Laws and mobile technology

'If I can't do it by iPhone, I don't do it.'

Technology and literature

"Why didn't we think of that?"

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

"Have you tried turning it off and back on?"

'Here comes Mr. 'Smarter-then-you'.'

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

Latest Aye Phone

Batman - Face ID

You are Here. We know where you've been.

"And the tech guy said not to worry if I lost my phone. There's an app for that..."

'We now have the technology to record your dreams. From now on, your dreams are our intellectual property.'

Investment Guru/Lifestyle Guru/Tech Guru/Fashion Guru

CIA Recommended TVs

Busy, Busy, Busy

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

"You'll really like this next song. I wrote it specifically to be a ring tone!"

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

Dogfights/Drone Fights

'How's the ringtone coming along, Ludwig?'

"Are we sure this is how we get our workloads into the cloud?"

Man and woman being spied on from their TV.

'I'm here in the rainforest to show you how to fashion an ipod using only twigs and moss.'

Richard Branson caricature.

"A brand new one will cost you $18. If I repair it the cost would be $397."

'I'm sorry my social needs are changing & I need to upgrade.'

Where the Buffalo Roam. . . 'Can you hear me now?'

When your cat has learned to use the phone...

'No - I'm not on the tube, I'm in a tube.'

"Always blame your mistakes on autocorrect and watch out for that tree."

"Is that your 'God Bless America' or mine?"

Another humdrum morning. Grind beans, make coffee, clean up coffee … wipe down counter … find cellphone left by some distracted customer, put in lost and found … have extraordinary revelation. My ship has come in! House of Java.net Cybercafe. Stay tuned …

"No thanks. I'm a knowledge worker."