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"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

'I installed all the floor tiles by myself. I did it all by tile and error.'

"If I knew when this was going to end, it wouldn't be so stressful."

Curling your hair for no reason

'If I can't do it by iPhone, I don't do it.'

"I really got used to working from home."

"My best friend is my phone."

Hollywood producer.

Decorating with Children

"I'll never understand wallpaper."

"We can't agree on a size."

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

Organized chaos.

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Where are the kids?'

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

Elwood 'I Can Fix This Myself' McGrunzen

Nest building

Skeleton model kit assembly instructions.

When Cows Discovered Mowers

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

TV Repair 101.

Workers rest

"A Party-Political broadcast is due in a minute."

Care to BBQ with genius inventor?

As space walking astronaut vacuums dust particles: 'Houston, we see to have the cosmic dust problem under control.'

"They've already had two upgrades while we've been standing in line."

Hollywood director.

Roberto Mancini

'I play heavy metal.'

'Not cars. here we're testing oblivious texters walking into walls.'

Ted tests the limits of his new mulching mower.