Mismatched Lovers Gifts

"Now make her fall in love with the roommate who's going to quit his job to become a DJ."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

Great British Eccentrics.

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

"I like that everything is mismatched. I just think it could be mismatched better."

The Eclectic Chair

Alligator Bars

Busy mom drops a child off at the kennels and is on her way to dropping the dog off at kindergarten.

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

'My socks don't match, but neither me nor my socks care.'

"I know that on-line dating service claims a 90% success rate, but let's face it, Henry, we're in that other ten percent!"

"Looks like there was a mix-up. Apparently the tank we ordered went to Vinny's Joke Shop in Hoboken, New Jersey."

'He popped the question last night. 'Who do you think will win the Cup?'

"I found the problem with your dryer. . . here are a bunch of socks you probably thought were lost!"

"Aw yeah, twist on the exhale! Twist on the exhale! Yeah yeah!!"

Aye, maybe I shouldn't get dressed in the dark.

"Jeremy called our relationship 'crunchy.'"

Dating site - buy a dog.

'Okay I'll admit you do look foolish but on positive side you were only one letter out!'

The Origin of Laundry Day

Lost Property: "How can I help?"

Never let your girlfriend pack your parachute.

Classic Film Festival. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I told you it wasn't a buddy movie!

'Your heart's not really in this job, is it?'

"Sold, to the gentleman with the paddle."

'When I asked to go somewhere nice and warm, I didn't mean inside your trendy jumper.'

One day in a boat out in the pacific. . . While at the same exact moment in a slum apartment in Brooklyn, N.Y....

Wedding nose ring

"he was a computer error of the Computer Dating Service"

'Sorry about wearing odd shoes. Luckily I have an identical pair at home!'

I smell feet ... Human feet. About six months ago, I was getting my car fixed, and on the wall of the garage, there was a sign that read, "Change worn shocks at 50,000 miles." I mistook "shocks" for socks."

'How's the eagle coming along?'

'You wouldn't believe the number of odd socks I have...'

"Son, it's bad enough you goof off all day, but your socks don't match!"

"Well, that's the last time we go on separate holidays!"