Miscommunication Humor Gifts

Bar code meeting

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

So, if you don't get this mail because I wrote the wrong address again, please reply to me a.s.a.p. Best, Bob

"I meant the dog!"

"No, a dressing down day isn't an opportunity to bollock the staff."

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

"This is not what I meant when I said 'let's chill'."

'So you are a writer?'

"Excuse me, but it's GREG, Greg Chalmers."

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

When you said it was a place with women and a bar I didn't think you meant a ballet class.

"When you said you were taking me south on vacation I assumed you meant to the tropics."

"OK, you're right. It does say take 2 tablets by mouth."

'I could have sworn you asked if I wanted to go to the saloon.'

"Aunt Mary, I think you may not have heard me right. I requested a bundt cake."

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

'Sir, I'm an estate agent. Not a showbiz agent.'

"Just wanted to make sure you said no mayo that way I'll know to give you extra."

"This to you left me says you want a wok."

'Chapman, you misunderstood what I said about the Clark account. I said mull it over.'

Sea kelp? I said "seek help"!

Shoot...not literally, of course.

"What makes you think you can patronize me?"

The Embarrassment of Van Gogh

'Your chart here says you've had some sort of allergic reaction to frogs' legs...can you be more specific?'

"I'm not sure you see my point of view..." "From down here I'd say that's probably true!"