Miscommunication Fan Gifts

"Elective surgery? But I'm not even registered to vote!"

"Who the hell is Sue?!"

"You fool! I said pillage! Pillage and burn!"

"There's a man at the door with a wooden leg."

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

"No, a dressing down day isn't an opportunity to bollock the staff."

-"What has this got to do with communication?" -"It's my invention...the hand smiley."

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

'Mr. Dobson, you don't have to dictate into the intercom, I'm sitting in the room with you.'

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

"Mr. Stilz asked Jean to ask Genie to ask Kelley to ask Dawn to ask Lisa to tell you he'd like to see you in his office."

"Excuse me, but it's GREG, Greg Chalmers."

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

Look, XYXX! They're friendly!

"When you said you were taking me south on vacation I assumed you meant to the tropics."

"At some point we'll sit down and resolve our differences, but for now the plan is to continue exchanging bitchy emails."

'I could have sworn you asked if I wanted to go to the saloon.'

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

"Matey! Me cell connection's down. Throw me a landline!"

Shoot...not literally, of course.

"Just wanted to make sure you said no mayo that way I'll know to give you extra."

'ARRRGH you idiot,you idiot!!' 'When i said take the Don out, i MEANT for lunch!!' (a stupid mob guy kills the boss)

'Chapman, you misunderstood what I said about the Clark account. I said mull it over.'

Sea kelp? I said "seek help"!

The Embarrassment of Van Gogh

"I'm not sure you see my point of view..." "From down here I'd say that's probably true!"

"Size 16? Sorry, I thought you said 61."

'I said Mascarpone not Mask A Pony!'

"You said you wanted an Easter-related present."

"Perhaps I should clarify. When I said to drink plenty of fluids ..."

"My mistake Guvnor - I thought you said CRAP circles!"