Mischievous Lovers Gifts

'The important thing to remember is we must forget this ever happened.'

A thief steals a heart

"Okay, you play dead. 1-2-3 Go!"

Misery lit...

"You've been a very bad man and we like that. So now, we're going to send you to London."

'Can't you just bat them between your paws like everyone else?'

"Why would I care of you scratch the couch? I'm not allowed on it..."

Law Books

'We were mud wrestling.'

Buster got religion in the pound and now works with other bad dogs.

How to avoid a heart attack.

'Mandy is playing cupid again!'

Pigeon Master

Cat lights rocket strapped to a dog

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

HisssssHerssss....

"Thanks for bringing the party mix, but. . ."

'I see you have been mopping the floor while I was out. Are you doing this to be nice or disposing of evidence?' 'Why can't it be both?'

"Who made this mess?"

"He looks so peaceful when he's asleep."

"Tuna and chicken bone breakfast smoothie. We were going to surprise you."

'Moral of the story? Oh, son, we don't have those.'

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'

I'm really proud of him, he's just got his first 'dogbo'...

'Do me a favor, Ed. Don't tell the other guys.'

'I told you not to argue with the ref, Dewey.'

The Devil's Advocat

'Sorry God, I think you got the wrong guy, I like sex, drugs and rock and roll.'

Jack started to note how these 'accidents' always occurred after he missed a shot.

Rabbit ears

"Mum said it's OK for us to watch. So it can't be much good."

She was to regret having asked Colin to be more of an animal in bed.

A pickpocket reaches through a statue in an art gallery.

'I always give the shy guys a 'booster shot'.'