Mirror Maestro Gifts

When Focus Group Researchers Go Head to Head

The Selfie of Dorian Gray.

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

Don't move, it's okay - I can see my reflection in your hair

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

"Holy hell. I should not have based my whole personality around this..."

Computer Music

"... and come out fighting, boys."

"Good luck, Sanders. We're sure going to miss that little imitation you do of me at office parties."

"Baldo, do you have a summer reading list?"

"We can't agree on a size."

'Oh, I dunno. hat would you like to evolve into?'

"These days I do a little sub-editing on the side too!"

Study more to pass more tests.

"Bacteria are fascinating. They multiply by dividing."

'There's more information available now than ever before. I can only block out so much of it.'

"Kind of makes your feel large and significant, doesn't it?"

'Forget about 'who,what,when,where,why,how'...Instead 'Will it sell papers...attract advertisers?'

The original sundial.

"Some 'King'. They didn't even give me an N95."

"When you quote a Presidential candidate, Gorman, you do not—I repeat—do not roll your eyes."

Arnold's clone refuses to workout: 'You're a huge disappointment, dude.'

These remarks are completely off the record

"Cool game!"

"And that's why we don't have nice things."

"How do you respond to critics who claim you're just trying to scare people?"

Amnesiac Deja View

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

"For goodness sakes, Harold. Stop preening!"

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

Every dishonest Politicians' worst nightmare Advisor: 'RUN, SIR, RUN!! IT'S A MEDIA-RITE!'