Mirror-matching Maestro Gifts

"Yes! I love having staring contests with you!!"

Mozart on a computer,

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

Charles Addams.

Children playing in the street

"Good luck, Sanders. We're sure going to miss that little imitation you do of me at office parties."

Edgar Allan Poe

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

'Where are the kids?'

The original sundial.

Nest building

"It's garage music."

'My Death Story....chapter one...'

Spinning Plates!

A Dummy Corporation.

"Of course I know what the rearview mirror is for...to check at any moment if my hair still looks ok."

"For goodness sakes, Harold. Stop preening!"

"Wait? I thought it was a 'look'?"

I got you a 20th anniversary present. An iPhone charger? An actual, real gift? What's the catch? House of Java Cybercafe. No catch. For the last 20 years, you've been the best whipping boy I've ever had. You're a complete tool of the technology industry. You've been a real pleasure to mock. In fact, the last 20 years of making fun of your pathetic life has made this two rewarding decades. Plug back in, whipping boy! I will outlast you, smelly old bat!

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

Are you sure that's not your age?

The Violin Artist

Questioning

"Because of your age, I'm going to recommend doing nothing."

'Nothing to do? Why don't you read the refrigerator.'

We are on the move. . .

"Hey Mundo, I'm collecting videotape for American's Dumbest Videos! Show me something stupid!"

'You say it's milk, oh, oh, I must have hooked up the wrong pipes.'

'I'm a court jester -- my socks aren't supposed to match!'

Carols

Out Of My Way, Stupid!

'A table for four please - she has an imaginary friend.'

Monica Seles

Man looking in mirror at the barber's.

When Focus Group Researchers Go Head to Head