Miracle Witnesses Gifts

Submarine Sees Jesus Walking on Water

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

Tiny Visions

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

Moses gets REALLY lost in the desert.

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"That's my boy!"

'Waiter, there's a mysterious stain on this napkin.'

Louis Pasteur

"Holy water, holy water...."

Moses Separates the Cream. . .

"Now don't expect any miracles. I'm only a para-scientist."

Great news! Scientists have cured many, many diseases! They've used new discoveries and innovative techniques to cure inherited liver disease

"Are you sure you sent out those invitations?"

"Yeah, but good luck getting it peer-reviewed."

'Fish and bread? That's it? Seriously?'

'You can't win -- I turned the water into wine, and then everybody wanted free refills!'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"Oooh! What's he gonna do now?!"

'This is wonderful. It will help millions of people.'

'Water into wine is certainly impressive. D'you do water into petrol?'