Medical Miracle Believers Gifts

Great news! Scientists have cured many, many diseases! They've used new discoveries and innovative techniques to cure inherited liver disease

2021

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

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"The first one's just a warning."

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

Robodoc... the NHS surgeon of the future.

'Your reflexes are still good!'

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

Tiny Visions

"O Lord—why art thou such a drama queen?"

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'Grandma, does the hospital charge by the pound when people have babies?'

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"Sometimes I wonder why I spent ten years at medical school and another 20 honing my skills..."

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

"How can you expect anyone else to believe in you when you don't believe in yourself?"

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994