Miracle Thinker Pillows

'Moses, this screams for development.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Fishing with God

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

Tiny Visions

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Quantum Psychic

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

Magic Tricks

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

Sisyphus visits Stowe

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

Sisyphus and coronavirus

"I learned one thing today. Attitude trumps aptitude!"

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

"The moon, the dinner, dancing. How could this night be more perfect?"

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

'And you thought you grew big pumpkins.'

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

Priest with the Pet Devil.

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

Folk o' the Wee

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

A voodoo doctor.

"That's my boy!"