Miracle Pondering Ponderer Pillows

Jesus' lesser known miracle at the wedding.

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

Idle parts

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

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"What's with kids nowadays? Walking upright's not good enough for you?"

'Are you sure we should do all this praying on Sunday? -- I thought it was God's day off.'

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

Why not get God's fax number, and just fax him my prayer?

God answers what He thought were worldwide prayers for peas.

Jesus wept

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'Though we must innovate, and though we must grow, we must never lose sight of our core mediocrities.'

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

"NO I DON'T THINK YOU NEED LEGAL REPRESENTATION WHEN SAYING YOUR PRAYERS."

Dorothy finds the Yellow brick road is now a 6-lane expressway.

'From creating stuff like this you make a LIVING?'

Various Birds of Pray.

'I know we're laying up treasures in Heaven, but I still think you should talk to the Church Board about your pension,'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"I'll have whatever they're having."

'Osgood was a theologian back on Earth, and he thought all this stuff would be allegorical.'

Introducing Ed, The Nephew of God.

Thomas Aquinas

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

Philosophy Department - Are You Really Here?

"Yeah, he changed water into wine but it was nothing you'd want to lay down."

Bishop reads menu which features only loaves, fishes, water and wine.

"I see a vague figure of someone groping...groping...groping..Yes, yes, it's coming in more clearly now! It seems to be—yes, it is a man! The man has a briefcase! And some papers! The man is an economist!"

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.