Minimum Wage Philosopher Gifts

'We're being paid minimum wage so do only a minimum amount of work.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

The Proust of Twitter

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

"It's somehow comforting to witness a revival of the classics in motivational technique."

'Money is a bit tight at the moment, so instead of cash we wondered whether you'd settle for 20% more meaningless protestations of how much we value you?'

"I never said they were well-compensated. I just said they were paid handsomely."

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

"The problem with capitalism is the unequal sharing of wealth. The problem with socialism is the equal sharing of wealth..."

"To be honest the culture sucks, but the pay is amazing."

"Look - we'll whistle when it's fifteen dollars an hour."

"If that income is personal, why do I have to tell you about it"?

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

"We pay the living dead wage."

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

'I found this copy of 'Atlas Shrugged' under his mattress!'

'I'm prepared to pay you a living wage. Of course, what kind of a living you get out of it is entirely up to you.'

My definition of 'quality time?'...charging $500 per hour.

'The only thing keeping me from being successful is not having a salary.'

"With so many applicants for a few jobs, we can lower the pay and drop the benefits!"

A problem is opportunity in working clothes.

Dispute over pocket money

'I suppose you've often wondered what you'd do if you had my income.'

"See here how his later work shows focus and sense of direction..."

'I hear your fees are very reasonable.'

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

Road repair crew in denial ('Personally, I don't see a problem here.')

'Of course I'm overpaid, everyone is overpaid!'

"But there has to be something wrong with me, Doctor. Money makes me extremely happy."

'If that's the going salary, then what's the starting salary?'

'It was his last wish.' (Dollar sign head stone.)

'I refuse to get a job as long as my allowance is higher than minimum wage.'

'Do you have one called Job?'