Miniature Amendment Author Gifts

'Danae's spent all this week writing new amendments, which I can only assume means she doesn't know what it'll take to get them into the constitution...so I sent her a link on the process...'

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'First, I'd like to list the mitigating circumstances.'

"It's a 'pencil' - It's like a pen, except that it's made of wood!"

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

Sushi Train Set.

'The end. Well, time for bed. What are you writing?'

'Can Bradley come out and litigate?'

"Now we know who'll be taking care of us in our old age."

'This is the shortest autobiography I've ever read!'

"It must be still charging."

Child with a junior chemistry set in the complaints department.

'My lawyer will get us out of here. This is a clear breach of human rights.'

'I don't care if you are just 2 years old, people don't have time to read your life story.'

Knight of the sandcastle.

'We never should have brought him that little lawyer kit. Suddenly, everything I ask him to do is capricious and arbitrary.'

Man sticking matchsticks together for Bryant and May

'Oh Darren, I just love what you've done with your dung.'

'I'd like to come out and play but I can't find a sitter.'

Joe's Foot-long Subs: A Man discovers he has been given a little real Submarine.

"Your autonomous tricycle will take you around the block and back. Now have fun, and don't touch anything!"

"I think this is the last year he'll believe in Father Christmas, he's asking a lot of questions"

'I'm five, but I can play three to seven and a half.'

A young boy shaving

"I'm bringing litigation against everyone who is responsible for my overly demanding socialization."

"I gave him some building blocks to keep him busy and off his computer. All he did was build a computer out of them."

"Some people collect miniatures, but we feel we have too much money for that."

'I'm sorry, Herbert, but graduating from kindergarten does not come with a hefty retirement package.'

"This side's for Brassicas,with potatoes in the middle, and soft fruit over there.""It's very ambitious for a window box."

'He ran a miniature golf course.'