Mindful Mountaineers T-Shirts

"Stay medicated."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

Roger feels that there are only two inante instincts in men and women. One is satisfaction of biological needs...the other is self-actualization.

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all.'

"You have got to want to change."

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

Parkinson Ave - Alzheimer Drive

'This is no time to start wondering whether you turned off the oven!

Been there. Done that. (Man stands between two doors.)

"Physically I'm in New York, Emotionally. . .I'm somewhere in the south of Florida."

"Mom?"

Crazy Straw. Crazy Straw after therapy

Therapist. The first step in therapy is acknowledging your issues, or as I like to call it, "baggage claim."

'I don't feel at home on the range.'

"Forgetting passwords doesn't make you a bad person, Arnold."

Just think of meditation as "mental floss."

"He went to an alternative therapy seminar to find ways of reducing his stress levels..."

SELF-ESTEEM CLINIC, 'The little-bitty door is a nice touch.'

"The meaning of life is cats."

People looking worried, sad and angry wait at the Emotional Baggage Carousel

Your own tedious thoughts next 200 miles

"Dear Bad-Karma, to assist you at this busy time, I've drawn up a list of people you may have missed."

"Please join me now in a group meditation."

Wetlands Environmental Reserve - Sensitive Area - Please keep your comments to yourself.

"You know what your problem is? You think too much."

Meditation Center

Psychiatry. Your disorientation is number 2248 in my psychiatry manual. You mean my daze is numbered?

'I've been working on my asceticism and self-denial for twenty years now -- could I go down to Las Vegas to test them?'

'I just attained enlightenment, guys! - GROUP HUG!'

"We at Megacorp are very supportive of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazcylone' to enhance the experience."