Mind Fixer T-Shirts

Head Mechanic.

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"I don't know who you are!"

Waiting for Pants

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

"Fido's determined to find that bone."

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

A man sews broken hearts back together.

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

Yes, yes, let your aggressions out, but not here!

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

Analyst and patient

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

"Well, how can I help cure your severe hypochondria if you keep cancelling appointments due to illness?"

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

"There's no point in our being friends if you won't let me fix you."

'No more appointments today, Miss Mitchell. I'm all psyched out.'

When psychiatrists do self analysis.

'My wife doesn't understand me.'

"I'd like to get something for my wife. Do you have any olive branches?"

A woman repairs a broken heart.

'I'm trying to work on Mr. Findlay's self-esteem, Miss Oglethorpe — stop giggling in there!'