Heart Fixer T-Shirts

A man sews broken hearts back together.

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

Waiting for Pants

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

"There's no point in our being friends if you won't let me fix you."

A woman repairs a broken heart.

It's too hard to clean my closet. Take out everything. Throw them into "keep", "donate" or "toss" boxes. Ok. Done!

Son? We need to talk about inappropriate life choices. I was joking. I'm not going to be an investment banker. Great! I'd hate to see you waste your talents. There are plenty of other jobs. Like the fixer who disappears famous athletes' awkward e-mails. You'll always be employed.

"You can't leave! I haven't had dinner yet!"

'Agreed then? Your boy takes a dive in the fifth...'

God's lil' fix-it shop.

"It ain't pretty. You got a bad flap-valve leak, and your tenor drones are all gunked up. It'll be a week at least, IF I can get the parts. I do got a loaner, but she ain't much."

Head Mechanic.

Power and the Glory tools

"Dad, I'll assemble yours if you assemble mine."

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

Unblocking the Fountain of Hope.

'Maybe you could get dressed faster if you lost that speed bump around your waist.'

Cardiology

Hospital. Emergency. Closed. I'm bleeding and the E.R. is closed, What should I do? Just go home? Suture self!

'It's our last resort.'

"Earl is stuck on that note again. Give him a good kick."

"Darling - I can't seem to find the invisible menders..."

"It isn't much of a business plan, is it?"

'I guess it's official now. No one in this town actually makes anything anymore.'

"I need help tolerating the mess I've made of my life."

Boss, someone called The Fixer is here to see you. Excellent. Go out and tell him I want him to teach you everything he knows. I don't see why I should have to keep paying him when I've got my very own minion. Pay extra attention to the issue vague threats to shut down lawsuits part. If he asks why I didn't fire him myself, you tell him I've moved to Botswana. Very bad man.

Despite being dumped by his girlfriend on Christmas Eve, Norman still found a way to pull the crackers despite her absence.

Tailor Shop. Repairs. Alterations. You're a tailor who fixes torn pants?! When we met in the bar you said you were a genetic engineer! No, I said I do "jean splicing"!