Millennium Celebrator Gifts

Y2k sign with bombs for the zeros and a man with a flute of champagne leaning on one

Pearly King and Queen

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

'I couldn't remember your exact age.'

"I'm not going to do any work...cos it's my birthday!"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

'She said her first words today.'

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

Proud mums.

"We brought him into oversee our millennium menu...he did such a good job on the last one"

'To prepare for Y2K, I backed up all discs and documents. . . stockpiled water and non-perishables. . . converted my investments to cash and set up a wood burning stove.'

A woman stares at a birthday cake that has "4,000,000 calories" written on top of it in icing.

'If there was one thing Methusela hated. It was his Birthday bumps.

The first birthday gift.

I'm 40! Oh. Well happy birthday. A lot of people wouldn't be happy about turning 40. But I'm thrilled! I've been looking forward to my midlife crisis for a long time. I've got it all planned. First I'm going to buy a sports car. Then I'm going to leave my family for someone half my age who really GETS me. Then we're going to embark on a road trip filled with booze, shoplifting and debauchery. Anyway, what's your most dangerous drink? I want something that says "I'm letting the tiger in me out to

The y2k bug being chased by the JFK bug

"We're celebrating our 25th anniversary, so separate checks."

"Jack, I'm looking through these old love letters, faded flowers and other sentimental objects meant to inspire tender memories… junk?"

"As long as we're renewing our vows anyway, I've come up with a few new ones."

"He had it commissioned just before he died."

"Over the long haul, it's been a long haul."

"Meanwhile at Oak Vista Rest Home... In case of birthday cake fire break glass."

'That does it! I've had it with that nincompoop! Every time there's a birthday, he's the first to sign the card and he never leaves room for anyone else!'

Life begins at 60

The Big Bad Wolf Turns 50.

'I do hope you enjoy your birthday lie-in, dear.'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

"Just a few hundred to tide me over 'til this Y2K thing is over."

"This is where the party budget ran out."

'I must be getting older, the cards joking about my age just don't seem as funny anymore'

"She just uses all that make-up to hide her age."

'Born again birthdays don't count.'

Handel sitting on a piano

Man holding a birthday cake.