Millennial Advocate Gifts

"We added it just for the millenials."

Politically Correct Snowperson

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

Welcome to your new English Class.

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

Mentoring Unit: 'Go on! You can do it! You can be a mentor!'

'Hmmphhhh ... High on Life. Now that's something the government ought to regulate.'

The Boy Who Wanted To Be A Lawyer - "Father Desmond, we need an exorcism."

"Have you considered vlogging?"

"The good news is, the children in the district have strong writing skills. The bad news is, we have sustained a letter-writing campaign from the third grade."

'I'm not enjoying my childhood, I'm dealing with it.'

Make good decisions!

"We don't make cookies anymore - I'm selling Girl Scout apps."

Alcohol and Tobacco Danger

Adult Crime, Not Adult Logic

"I moved to the Internet to be closer to my children."

The Cheddar College for Extra Mature Students

The Minor Issue

Captain Millennial

Girl to mother: 'Don't call me a teenager. From now on, I want to be referred to as a pre-adult.'

'I just think everyone in the family should have the same rights and privileges.'

'Don't get me wrong, I love children. I'm just not ready to hire them.'

Adult Crime, Not Adult Logic

'If youth is so important why didn't god give the ten commandments to someone younger?'

Gen Z

"There aren't many jobs for teenagers these days."

"Emotional support person or not, you cannot bring your Mom to work."

'We're not called young offenders social workers any more. I'm a scum whisperer.'

Metamorphosis: Nature's Magnificent Reveal

"If you ask me, this multi-generational living is way overrated."

"Whenever I meet somebody, I try and accept them for who I am."

"... No, my parents don't want me home so early because they don't trust me... They don't trust you!"

"Do you think our son is growing up too fast?"