Military Family Pillows

"By George, that should do it - as long as we don[t bomb our own men again "

"You know, Daddy... We should thank a vet every day."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Support the Ex-Troops

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Cry babies.

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

Licensed Therapist

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

'Ahhh...'

The Baby Walker

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

My First Camera

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

Impressing dad.

'He has your nose and my ears.'