Military Donor Gifts

"Dinner was absolutely delicious, and thanks again for the bombers."

Happy Labour Day: While you enjoy that last long weekend of summer, remember...there are some folks who aren't taking the weekend off.

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

Maple tree donating syrup at a syrup drive clinic.

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

'Still no money, but a lot more IOU's than usual!'

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to the less fortunate...

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

"It's that Silicon Valley foundation - they want to know if we'll match our grandson's $100 million donation."

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

"Okay, we've donated to the Food Bank, Feed the Hungry, Food for Life, Hunger Helpers, Starving World, Second Helpings. . . is anyone else getting hungry?"

'Sorry - I've got strong views on Sunday Trading!'

'Good news, men, when we give to the poor now, it will qualify for federal matching funds.'

"We gave our lives in Afghanistan for some totally incompetent politicians. . ."

The next step in human evolution was homophilanthropist.

"You know, Daddy... We should thank a vet every day."

'Can I choose which brick you name after me?'

Thanks And Giving.

"No, there is not an annual cap on tithes."

'I want to leave my body to the medical school, and my mind to the psychiatric hospital.'

'Have you seen my amplifier.'

Peter Cruddas

'It was all she had to offer, vicar.'

Give To Tsunami's Victims.

"Don't be so mean...give him some money!"

"The university is delighted with the endowment but is there any flexibility over calling it the 'who's the rich one now you toffee nosed bastards' wing?"

Half of those who made no donations last year 'do not trust charities'.

"Seems to start earlier every year."

$102 War Chest

"It's a large gift - a very large gift. So the question is: do we rename ourselves 'Aunt Tilly's Frozen Fish University'?"