Mileage Maestro Gifts

This one gets 40 miles per gallon!

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

'If I can't do it by iPhone, I don't do it.'

"Great idea of yours to offer their money back if not satisfied."

"My best friend is my phone."

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

Okay, let's see...who's on tap to update our progress with that hostile takeover?

'What does the internet have against my people?'

The merger hits a snag.

"...And please let the merger do through!"

Lawrence of Suburbia

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

"Remember, negotiating is like buying fruit. You don't know what you'll get until you squeeze 'em a bit."

I was a day late and a dollar short, but it was a personal best!

When Cows Discovered Mowers

Just Merged.

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

'Overwhelm the facts with interpretation and have it on my desk Thursday.'

Setbacks in the development of the rubber mallet.

'No wonder you can't relax! Seven hundred miles in one day!'

"They've already had two upgrades while we've been standing in line."

'It's not a stick-up, it's a merger offer.'

'Not cars. here we're testing oblivious texters walking into walls.'

'This is where we merged our 'creative' and 'accounting' departments.'

Chinese business cuisine.

Door to business for corporate consolidation attorneys with many names on it.

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

'This little baby allows you to automatically block halftime shows.'

'You're in great shape! You've got years of hostile take-overs ahead of you.'

Scrapyard Worker

A Bus Conductor.

"It's so boring out there."

What can I say - Global warming enriches my life!