Middle-age Enthusiast Gifts

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

How Rings In Nature Indicate Aging.

Breast Height Chart

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

"I put my faith in coal. Because there’s no fuel like an old fuel."

"It's time we discuss menopause and climax change."

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

Midlife: You Are Here.

'It looks like you're suffering from TMB... too many birthdays...'

Mid-century Father

Peace on Earth

The end of innocence

"I enjoy being old - my health always gives me something to talk about!"

"I'd like to make a return."

Warning: Contents may settle over time.

"You don't have OCD or ADD. You have OLD."

"Norman still has seventies flashbacks sometimes."

'Admit it, George-you're too old to chase after does.'

Jack Kerouac

"See, the problem with doing things to prolong your life is that all the extra years come at the end, when you're old."

'The bad news is you've lived well beyond your expiration date.'

"It's male pattern osteoporosis."

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"That's just the meds kicking in."

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

"I signed up for 'Dressage Without the Horse.'"

I'm not sure when I can help you. It's not easy getting parts for you anymore

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

'You know you're 40 when...'

'You can try, but once they're past forty, you can't teach them new tricks.'