Microwave Experimenters T-Shirts

"I'm studying the effects of prolonged radiation exposure on a panzerotti."

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

'I may not know about DNA, but I sure as hell know about recombinant.'

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

"I'm putting you on country music."

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

"You were supposed to have invented fire!"

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.

'All our family's creativity is channelled into finding ways to gain weight.

"Let me show you my latest D.I.Y. project."

Cooking Contest. I hear you can make tempura out of anything. Yep -- Anything you can do, I can do battered!

Seriously, try leaving them out for a day. They're delicious al dente!

"Bear in mind, George, that even an experimental physicist must at times be reasonable."

New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread

'Mom, I don't care how high in fiber they are. Broccoli flakes are going to fail as a breakfast cereal.'

April 12,1989: The last day Ryan ever ate pancakes. 'I ran out of pancake mix so I fried up patties of my facial cream.'

"First, break the egg...."

'If only you would let me cover this Tofu-vegetables stuff with ketchup, it would at least LOOK like real food...'

Soup on a stick

'How did you get your pastry so thin?' Steam roller.

Crash Testing Clown Car.

Students at Watertown High discovered that the tubing from Chem Lab was perfect for bungee jumping.

"Latest in Microwave Technology."

"Lab-grown?"

'I made the mistake of buying Greg a do-it-yourself wine making kit and a beer kit. Now we've got a 5-year supply of chianti with a thick, creamy head.'

'You're putting fruit into your famous tuna smoothie.'

'I warned you to stop snarfing down the free samples!'

Joe's Bar and Microwave 'The grill got busted.'

Revenge on Santa

Faith-Based Tuna Casserole