Microscope Maven Gifts

'If you increase the magnification another million times you can see the safety regulations.'

Great moments in science. . . 'Nice work, you've isolated the funding gene.'

"The resolution is superb, but I can't stand having to wait through all the ads first."

The Bacteria Bowl

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'Good, our side's winning!'

'Don't mind Ashley. After looking through a microscope all day, anything large startles him.'

Cell splitting - don't do that.

Scientist looking down microscope - "My God! They're at it again.."

'Look at this! These little critters are not asexual after all.'

Humanity vs. Corona

'Do you get the feeling we're being watched?'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

Fear

Free radicals.

'What are YOU looking at?'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

Food Science Lab. There's jealousy among the peanut butter molecules. "Smooth" does out all the time and "chunky" can't get a date.

"Scientists have created a flea from scratch."

"He's one cell short of an amoeba!"

"The organism is so rare there are no Chicken Soup for the Soul books dedicated to it."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'He takes his doodling very seriously.'

Shaken not stirred

Scientist counting microscopic things he can see in his microscope

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

Espresso Martini Peacock

Business is off the chart.

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

Subatomic particles

Free-Floating Anxiety

'I don't believe it - if this evidence is correct it'll rock the very foundations of our research grant application.'

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'