Microbe Maven Gifts

'He's one of those genetically-altered antibodies.'

'One reason this condition is so hard to cure is that it's caused by one of the teeniest viruses.'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

In the Guru District

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"National security adviser"

"And this is our media room."

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

Signs: Sales, Profit and Media coverage.

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

"I'm going to get you fired."

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

The Freedom of the Press is Worth Fighting For!

"Reports that AI is planning a world takeover are greatly exaggerated."

Fifty shades of Leveson.

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

Reporter #6: television.

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"A newspaper has a responsibility to ensure that its readers are fully informed."

"Okay, quote me. I'm on the record."

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

Print Suicide

Dr. Phil takes it home.

The Quack Quack Diaries: The Decline And Fall Of Wolfman Quack

"Good evening. In today's top story, my book has jumped to Number Three on the best-seller list."