Microbe Maniac T-Shirts

"I'm going to get you fired."

Centers for Disease Control. Staff Picks. Jean. Rob. Carly. Ed. Sonia. Kim.

'Bad news - that new antibiotic has just about put us on the endangered-species list.'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Eighteen

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

Free-Floating Anxiety

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

'We come in peace. Unless, of course, you have stuff that we want.'

'I don't believe it - if this evidence is correct it'll rock the very foundations of our research grant application.'

'Catch this!'

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

Lyme Disease Research Lab

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

"Ever killed a man?"

Asexual harassment.

"Eureka!!" "Guess again, Einstein."

Friendly bacteria

'Look - it's SUPERBUG!'

"I feel so seen right now."

"This invasion is gonna be a piece of cake. Look, they're already surrendering."

'The anaerobic ones are just sitting there, but the aerobic bacteria are doing jumping jacks, sit-up, leg lifts....'

Louis Pasteur

Just what is it that amoebas really want.

'This is quite a thrill. I've never been on electron microscope before.'

"Kind of makes your feel large and significant, doesn't it?"

Scientist to scientist looking in microscope: 'Be careful - they sense fear.'

"They don't look familiar...probably from another fecal transplant."

'Pierre...It's garbage night!'

"What I really hate is preventive medicine. They go after us before we even do anything."

Tetracycline: Bicycle built for 4 organisms.'

'Look, more Unidentified Gawping Objects.'

Journalist interviewing a bird.