Metric Mastermind Gifts

'But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring.'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

Small child building a large contraption from junk

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

"I believe we have a quorum for the meeting."

"The team needs LEADERSHIP, anyone have a view on that?"

wealth investment

'Harold is the brains behind the Smudge-o-Rama mailer.'

Dept. of the Treasury

Computer operator welding machine.

The United States' economy deflating.

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

"This is super. I asked for super-duper."

Carlo Ancelotti

'Our problem is, we do more blamestorming than brainstorming.'

"I think I've finally figured out who's on first."

"Today's top priority is prioritizing our priorities."

'I think I found the problem.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

"Mmm, processed food. Just like mom used to microwave."

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

"To be honest, it's the same stuff just in different bottles!"

"We're targeting a specific demographic: the utterly clueless."

"A Leading cosmetics company believes our drilling mud would ake an excellent skincare product."

I don't like the looks of this.

The imagery attacks the compalcency of the casual web surfer and uses a visual cacophony of discordant images to excite and enthusethe casual visitor...

Jurgen Klopp Caricature

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

"Now, where was I? Oh yeah - interest rates..."

Management by committee: 'The buck stops here, here, here, here,,,'

Alex Ferguson