Metric Enthusiasts Pillows

"You'll appreciate that it's now half a kilo of tuppeny rice."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'But I digress...'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"It seemed like miles to me!"

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

When Dinosaurs ruled the Earth.

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'190 divided by two...'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

Common Core Family Therapy

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"When the teacher explained negative numbers, I suddenly understood how politicians 'deficit spend'."

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

'Dad 'If Jack brought 10,000 shares at $3 and he sold 75% of them to Larry for $8 before the value went down to $2, what did Jack end up with?''

Math Teacher

"That was Copernicus on the phone – he says you're NOT the centre of the universe!"

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

'This part was tenure.'